Changing the clocks makes me philosophical...

I am surprisingly excited about changing the clocks this weekend. For the past two weeks I have been struggling to get out of bed. Come morning, I feel the cool air in my bedroom and pull the covers to my neck. Then glancing out the little sliver of window that's uncovered by the blind, the dark gray sky makes me want to fall back into my dreams. Today, Sunday, the first day with the clocks back, the day I can safely sleep-in, I was happily up before 7. (Notice I also started a blog today.)

Now I am daydreaming about getting out of bed at the crack of dawn, from this day forward, to shower, dress, write a chapter, make lunches, blog, savor a cup of tea, bake bread, and generally solve all the world's problems before waking the children for school. Fantasy aside, will this actually translate into getting up early on Monday? I have to believe it will help. I have to believe that small changes can make a big impact. We can't all move to India to find ourselves. I barely have time to pick up the phone and talk to faraway people I love.

My life has changed tremendously in the past decade. What once felt like a leisurely country ride on a tandem bike, now feels like a cross-country trek on a steam locomotive. There are more passengers and baggage and it's much harder to turn the vehicle around, but there are few opportunities for wrong turns because the track is already laid out. Life is good, but the sheer weight of it can be overwhelming. The heaviness involved with caring for others and being responsible for people in addition to yourself. Children grow and parents age--until they don't anymore. I have to remind myself that the old folks are right, I will be longing for these crazy moments once they're gone forever. The muddy dog jumping on the couch, the children puking in our bed, the fights to get little people to brush their teeth; these moments will be funny anecdotes. Some of them are already. I should be bounding out of bed everyday, excited to see what the gods have come up with, but my sneaky mattress often tricks me into staying in bed longer than I should, causing everyone to rush and have a miserable morning. But this Monday, thanks to the time change, that sliver of daylight peaking out from around the blinds, just might be enough to make me slide my legs out from under my warm blankie and start solving all the world's problems.